I would say I’m a very resilient person. Katie often says that nothing phases me, and my Mum would often say I take everything in my stride. I often say that as long as I have a good playlist going, I can do anything I need to or want to.
Quarantine lately had been getting the best of me.
I just felt miserable, and I didn’t want to do anything about it. I had loads of uni work to do, and no motivation to do it. I didn’t care. And for anyone who knows me, knows that is not me at all.
But, how can you find the energy to give to something that isn’t going to heal yourself anyone else, during a time of crisis? It seemed pointless. It seemed ridiculous to even begin to think about.
All I cared about was working out and exercising, because I felt like I was absolutely looking after myself. Keeping myself healthy.
Katie repeatedly asked me what was wrong, and tried her best to look after me in anyway she could. But even that was difficult, when she was working at home full time. I sometimes would spend lots of time “keeping myself to myself”, and worrying. Productive.
I am not going to give you any “tips” or “tricks” to “help” with a lack of motivation. All I want to say to anyone feeling the way I was; you aren’t alone. Yes, I know that is a phrase that is well worn out and stretched thin during this quarantine, but today I dust it off and give it back to you.
Take your time, friend. Some of us, most of us, have all the time in the world now.
Look after yourself. Feel what you need to feel, but please try to accept the company of others, because as soon as I did that, I know I felt immensely better.
Don’t focus on what you have to do, focus on what you want to do, if you have the option to do that, that is.
Rest easy. Your motivation and excitement for life will come back. This is a crazy time, and our brains can’t keep handling the quantity of sadness in the news, or the changing goal posts.
You are doing great.
Though your dreams be tossed and blown– You’ll Never Walk Alone
Walk on, walk on.
With hope in your heart
And you’ll never walk alone