When we put the photos in, and I put it on, I didn’t feel happy. I felt safe. I felt like, now I have my locket, Mummy will always be in the right ventricle of my heart, and I could always show people a picture of my Mum. I felt more relaxed, like I didn’t have to try so hard to keep remembering. But most of all, I felt close to Mummy.
Yoga stopped being about the movement, and became about integrity.
Life is good, and I’m enjoying every second of it!
Sometimes, making plans for the following week seems like a great idea – and sometimes it is – but other times, you just have to cancel because all you need to do is gather your strength at home.
That’s my Mum, she existed, she laughed, there was a time she wasn’t dying or sad, when this wasn’t our reality, and when she could hug me and tell me everything’s going to be okay. The pain is just an indicator of how strong our bond was.
“Okay Evee, you’re on your own now, and you have to put as much distance between this tragic event as you can.”
Resilience and roller-skating go hand in hand. You slip up and fall on your butt, with your hands slapping the concrete besides you. You look up, praying no one saw, and a little voice says in the back of your head “This is the important bit, go on, get back up.”
I remember a page where I just scribbled “WHY”. One word which took up the whole page. I scratched it in so much the letters were thick and black but each time I drove my pen into the paper I felt a release.
I don’t wonder why they behaved this way, but I ask myself why I responded. I put this individual’s behaviour down to them having a bad day and I forgive them. Yet I can’t forget the fact that they saw me at my most vulnerable, and strangers must have seen me as weak.
Whether we mean it or not, productivity is charged with a complex definition; what you produce has to be something we can measure against society’s standards, and it has to be useful.