But this is my world. Those were the cards I had been dealt. I have been living without my Mum for 14 months now. I have been doing okay.
Grief is unpredictable. And seemingly timeless.
It started grating on me so much, that I felt irrationally angry whenever I had my lamp on and realised that the Feeble Light was still on, doing his best to grace me with his presence. Yet, he was so dim I did not idea he was there.
I see a girl who got through a difficult year of her life. It was nothing like the worst, but it was nothing like the easiest. I see a girl who has been hurt, who has healed, and who looks to the future with bright eyes. I see a girl who is not perfect, who makes a plethora of mistakes, who has a library of stories and someone who keeps on trying, no matter what.
I wonder if I’ll ever come to terms with the fact that you aren’t here anymore. Will I ever be comfortable when September comes around and brings…… Read more “It’s Been a Year”
“I don’t ask why me anymore. I believe everyone, everything I have been through, every person I have met, is in my life for a purpose. A…… Read more “As Told By Lisa Mae”
“I still ask ‘why me?'” Thank you to anonymous for submitting this short, simple, but heartfelt post. Feel free to email anonymous submissions in at firstname.lastname@example.org It…… Read more “As Told By Anonymous”
A new happy that remembers the grief that robbed my family back in 2018 but shows up anyway. A happy that gives a little sad sigh at the end of each day and says “I wish I could facetime my mum”.
The very first photo is my lovely mum in a blue ballgown, taken on the 14th of September, 2013. I would have been 13. The royal blue of Mum’s dress brightens and flaunts her clear blue eyes. A faint, hesitant smile has only aged 7 years with fondness and love. Her hair is short, and slightly messy. I love it, but I can imagine mum brushing her fingers through it only moments beforehand.
I would say I’m a very resilient person. Katie often says that nothing phases me, and my Mum would often say I take everything in my stride. I often say that as long as I have a good playlist going, I can do anything I need to or want to.
Quarantine lately had been getting the best of me.