Now I am faced with life after Mum. Life without Mum, with myself, a stranger, who still bases their decisions on what their Mum would do.
I don’t wonder why they behaved this way, but I ask myself why I responded. I put this individual’s behaviour down to them having a bad day and I forgive them. Yet I can’t forget the fact that they saw me at my most vulnerable, and strangers must have seen me as weak.
Grief is not a one-size-fits-all experience. If you are grieving, be gentle with yourself. Know that everyone copes differently. And when you do fall apart, know it is normal. Make room for it.
I’ve not really been one to ever let myself be overly emotional about relationships, so it wouldn’t make sense for me to barrel full-force into oversized valentines day cards, stuffed bears carrying hearts and triumphantly pull out and a box of chocolates and say THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE ONE.